{"id":156,"date":"2006-09-26T21:59:20","date_gmt":"2006-09-26T21:59:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wp\/?p=156"},"modified":"2006-09-26T21:59:20","modified_gmt":"2006-09-26T21:59:20","slug":"funny-well-almost-anyway","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/2006\/09\/26\/funny-well-almost-anyway\/","title":{"rendered":"Funny. Well, almost anyway"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>24 days since a last post.<\/p>\n<p>I knew this would happen&#8230; I wonder if anyone&#8217;s reading this&#8230;?<\/p>\n<p>Huh.<\/p>\n<p>There was going to be a point to this post. But it&#8217;s completely left my head.<br \/>\nSo&#8230; things that made me laugh. <a href=\"http:\/\/www.moronland.com\/moronia\/moron\/919\/\" target=\"blank\">This page from Moronland.com<\/a> about things said in court rooms. Funny.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?<br \/>\nWITNESS: He said, &#8220;Where am I, Cathy?&#8221;<br \/>\nATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?<br \/>\nWITNESS: My name is Susan.<\/p>\n<p>ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?<br \/>\nWITNESS: The <a class=\"zem_slink\" title=\"Autopsy\" rel=\"wikipedia\" href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Autopsy\">autopsy<\/a> started around 8:30 p.m.<br \/>\nATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?<br \/>\nWITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!<\/p>\n<p>ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?<br \/>\nWITNESS: Oral.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Ah&#8230; the masses are asses.<\/p>\n<div class=\"zemanta-pixie\" style=\"margin-top: 10px; height: 15px;\"><a class=\"zemanta-pixie-a\" title=\"Enhanced by Zemanta\" href=\"http:\/\/www.zemanta.com\/\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"zemanta-pixie-img\" style=\"border: none; float: right;\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/img.zemanta.com\/zemified_e.png?w=1165\" alt=\"Enhanced by Zemanta\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>24 days since a last post. I knew this would happen&#8230; I wonder if anyone&#8217;s reading this&#8230;? Huh. There was going to be a point to this post. But it&#8217;s completely left my head. So&#8230; things that made me laugh. This page from Moronland.com about things said in court rooms. Funny. ATTORNEY: What was the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[13],"tags":[83,292,325,802,886,902,1218,1425,1740,1742,2398,2454,2690,3130],"class_list":["post-156","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humour","tag-83","tag-asses","tag-autopsy","tag-court-rooms","tag-death","tag-denton","tag-games","tag-history","tag-law","tag-law-enforcement","tag-police","tag-prosecuting-attorneys","tag-september","tag-united-states","has-post-title","has-post-date","has-post-category","has-post-tag","has-post-comment","has-post-author",""],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6OeSW-2w","jetpack-related-posts":[],"builder_content":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/156","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=156"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/156\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=156"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=156"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/thomasjpitts.co.uk\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=156"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}